The Cost of High Capacity Living
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Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and not recognized yourself? Not only physically Nicole (00:10) But where did the joy, where did the vibrance, where did the glow go? Not only because of age, but there's just something missing. Nicole (00:32) Health starts to de deteriorate. Nicole (00:37) We go on living day to day to get through to the next paycheck, to the to get into a relationship, to finish school. We wait for the kids to grow up. We're just waiting for the perfect time to take care of ourselves. To it's okay because we gotta do the to do list. If we do the to do list and we do the Nicole (01:07) all of the things then somehow we feel validated if we can get everything done and pay the bills and Nicole (01:21) Survive, that's okay. When did that become okay? Nicole (01:29) That's why this podcast exists. Because the li life does happen and life gets heavy, and we do the best every single day just to survive the day or the week. Nicole (01:41) So many women Nicole (01:47) are out there hurting and just surviving. Nicole (01:53) And that was me. I was one of them. Surviving, living with stress, burnout, going through divorces, parenting, financial pressure, health struggles, taking care of everyone else and everything else. And then you walk by that mirror. Nicole (02:14) And you say, Who am I now? What do I want? How do I find myself again? Or maybe your health is a wreck because of the chronic burnout, the chronic stress, the con the chronic go, go, go, push yourself harder. I used to mentally tell myself, Well, it's okay, just put on your big girl panties and keep going. Just keep going. Nicole (02:43) Just keep going. Nicole (02:47) And I know I'm not the only one that does that. Nicole (03:00) I spent so many years in survival mode. Nicole (03:06) I didn't e didn't even know it. I thought I was fine. Nicole (03:12) But looking back I was looking for fulfillment and sometimes instant gratification like food and relationships. I would work harder, be better. Nicole (03:26) you know, in my degree achievement would somehow make me feel better about myself. I would dive into self help books of all kinds. That was what I write what I would read. I dn really like fiction books. I prefer nonfiction and just the self help. From a young age, I was trying to get myself I knew s internally Nicole (03:55) I think I knew something was wrong. I wanted to be better. Maybe not something was wrong, but one of my internal goals from a very young age was just do the best I can every day. Be better every day or try to be better every day than I was the day before. Nicole (04:23) Distractions. I was a queen of distractions. Something happens. Something's uncomfortable. Just distract yourself with the food, with the relationship, with the achievement, with the books. Don't deal with anything. Just just distract. That was and work. Distract and work. Work was a healthy way to distract myself. I thought. Nicole (04:52) On the inside I was hurting, I was in a lot of pain, I was alone, sad, it was a dark place. On the outside I achieved my nursing degree. I had an o a decent career. I was providing for my children. Sometimes that meant working two and three jobs. Nicole (05:17) Who thought that was a good idea? I did at the time. Nicole (05:23) Was there another way? Yes. Did I know it then? No. Nicole (05:34) So there I was, hurting on the inside, striving on the outside, hiding, carrying wounds I didn't understand, exhausted, lost, confused. Nicole (05:48) But I kept going. I did this for Nicole (05:54) wow, twenty years, maybe even more. Just keep going. Just keep going. Just keep going. Nicole (06:06) The breaking point. Nicole (06:11) That was a that was a season. Eventually if you run hard enough and fast enough first long enough. Nicole (06:24) You will fall. Nicole (06:28) We aren't designed to Nicole (06:33) To to live like that. We aren't designed to not rest. We aren't designed to go go go go go go go all the time. Nicole (06:45) And that's what happened. Living life on the go. Just I just keep saying go, because that's what I did. Just go. Wake up, do it again. Go to sleep, wake up, do it again. Wake up, do it again. There was anything that happened in my life, that was my just keep going. I never slowed down to really feel. Nicole (07:14) an experience and really process it. Just keep going. Nicole (07:24) Then Nicole (07:29) All of a sudden. Nicole (07:33) One thing after another life started just falling apart. Everything that I thought I had control of I didn't. Everything that I loved I felt was taken away from me. Nicole (07:47) It exploded and I was already mentally, emotionally, physically I was exhausted in any way. In every way possible. I literally didn't feel like I could go on anymore. I didn't have the strengths to do what I needed to do to get my life back. Nicole (08:16) But I couldn't give up because that's not what I do. That's not ingrained in me. I had two choices. I could give up or I could just keep going. To me, giving up would be worse than going. So I did. The only thing I knew how to do is just go. Get up every day and go. Do the best you can every day. Nicole (08:50) So there I was, I kept going. Nicole (08:54) Although this was a little different because unexpectedly I experienced peace. Peace during that dark season of my life that I shouldn't have been experiencing in that moment. I o I even pushed it away because it shouldn't have been there. I should not have had peace in that moment. But I knew I knew that it was God. Nicole (09:25) I didn't ha I wasn't close with God. I didn't have a relationship with God but Nicole (09:30) Over the years I feel like he he did talk to me. Nicole (09:35) Or I felt his presence, but not more than in that moment. Nicole (09:43) Circumstances didn't change, but that piece reminded me that maybe maybe God was there and just maybe it's gonna be okay and maybe I can keep going. Nicole (10:09) Through the years I learned to surrender. I learned that I didn't know everything. I learned that I needed Nicole (10:22) peace and joy again. I knew I needed my family. I knew I needed my kids. I knew I needed Nicole (10:31) Things that I took for granted before I saw in a whole new light. Nicole (10:37) Healing wasn't overnight. It was Nicole (10:44) A long drawn out process. Nicole (10:47) But looking back now, I could see that God had to tear apart my life so he can rebuild it back to what he intended it to be. Nicole (11:05) I have a purpose for my life just like everyone else. And I was not living it. And that's partially why I was so miserable and unhappy. And just trying to Nicole (11:21) Fill fill a void any way I can. Nicole (11:32) Through the years of my nursing career, I've always loved being a nurse. It's been such a blessing to be able to be a part of so many lives and to help so many people and to be a part of this profession. I am blessed and thankful for this. There is a dark side of nursing as well. Long hours, high demands. Nicole (12:01) on call hours. It is hard. It's hard for it's hard for the nurse. It's hard for the nurses' families. And Nicole (12:18) Sometimes you can end up feeling powerless. Nicole (12:24) Powerless to change your situation, powerless to to help people, because a lot of times in my career I was watching people get sicker and sicker and sicker and keep returning for sometimes the same thing over and over again. Sometimes they just kept coming back, but I would watch them get sicker and sicker. And no matter how much education I would give, Nicole (12:53) I didn't feel like it was Nicole (12:59) ever fruitful or very seldom. Nicole (13:06) So there I was feeling powerless and burnt out. Nicole (13:14) several times throughout my career I felt a call to be more, to do more. Something was missing, but I didn't know what. Nicole (13:26) And it wasn't until Nicole (13:30) I was sitting there looking for CEUs for my nursing degree continuing education. I was looking for holistic Nicole (13:43) continuing education which was always hard to find. Nicole (13:51) And then I found nurse coaching. It was like the sun started to shine on my computer. I was like I was reading about what nurse coaching was and it was exactly I could not believe that there was a certification on exactly what I feel called to do. Nicole (14:18) But didn't even know it. If that makes sense. I didn't know. I felt called to more to more, but I didn't know what it was. And then when I saw nurse coaching, that was exactly what it was. Nurse coaching helped, I mean, it trains nurses to address the emotional side of patience, to be able to Nicole (14:48) care for patients and be there for patients and their families and even themselves in a completely different way. Nicole (14:56) Nurse coaching training changed my life. Nicole (15:02) And I have no doubt in my mind. Nicole (15:06) That that was another stepping stone. The Lord is rebuilding my life right in front of my eyes. Still not completely great or pretty or peachy as I would like it to, but I'm so thankful. Nicole (15:25) For what he's doing in my life. Nicole (15:31) But what I learned through nurse coaching, I already knew this, but it just built on this. But healing is more than just symptoms. Nicole (15:42) Healing includes the whole person. Nicole (15:49) Healing is much more difficult in the presence of stress, trauma, and all-encompassing your faith, your relationships, your lifestyle, and something that I didn't really understand, but how impactful your identity is on your health as a whole. Nicole (16:17) So what you'll learn here in this podcast is a collection of everything that I have learned over the years. Nicole (16:26) And I just ha I have a passion. I Nicole (16:31) I want to help people understand and I want to help people experience a transformation that I experienced because Nicole (16:41) Everyone deserves to live a life a fulfilled life that is that they are happy and healthy. Happy and healthy. Nicole (16:55) and able to achieve and do whatever it is on their heart that they would Nicole (17:02) that they desire or that you know the the calling that God placed on their heart. Nicole (17:08) So we'll cover things like root cause healing, various health topics such as hormones, inflammation, nervous system nervous system regulation, and sleep. We will cover topics on life, burnout, boundaries, habits, emotional healing and relationships, and furthermore on faith and identity. Nicole (17:36) Your purpose, self-worth, creating the transformation that you desire, becoming the woman God created you to be. Nicole (17:46) My mission Nicole (17:49) is health is not the destination. Health is a vehicle. The goal is Nicole (18:00) Restoration, alignment, peace, confidence. Nicole (18:07) Creating a life you love and learning to trust yourself and love yourself again. And that's why I created my three month transformational coaching experience that is an embodiment of everything that I discussed in this podcast and my through my experience I have put together this this coaching experience that is just truly phenomenal. It covers Nicole (18:36) It will touch on health, identity, whole person healing, physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. This is a three month. Nicole (18:47) experience that you will come out on the other end. Nicole (18:54) A completely different person. Nicole (19:02) I want to remind you that you are worthy of healing. You are worthy of peace. You are worthy of happiness. You are worthy of becoming the woman God created you to be. Nicole (19:18) If this episode changed you in any way or you thought of a friend or a family member that you thought might enjoy it, please subscribe to this podcast and share it with those that you love. If you'd like to learn more, you can find me at nstransformative coaching dot com Nicole Schrader Transformative Coaching. I'll see you on the next episode.
